I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
