Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Randomize