My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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