also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
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