Whoa Z and x make the same sound
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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