This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
