I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
