fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
