Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
