he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
