OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Randomize
