Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
