Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
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