in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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