Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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