Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
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