Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
foreskin is a definite game changer
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
