Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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