I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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