Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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