Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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