It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize