Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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