So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
