she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Why are your pants in the freezer?
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