You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
Randomize
