I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize