bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Randomize
