god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
