Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
nutella sex= disaster
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Randomize
