Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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