I want to make a zoo with you.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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