The maid of honor just puked.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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