This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
not ubering you a puppy
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Randomize
