so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
they're like a gay fantastic four
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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