I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
