OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
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