Joe is yelling at the trees again.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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