would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
