You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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