i can't believe i had my finger in that
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
