so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
