You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
