He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Randomize
