people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
