Old men and throwing up are my life now.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
