I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Randomize
