omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
