He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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