I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
