I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
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