Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
